Zengzi, a disciple of Confucius known for his devotion to filial piety and integrity, once fell gravely ill. As his students gathered around his bedside, he called them close and said, "Look at my hands and feet—they are still intact. The *Book of Songs* says, 'Be cautious, as if facing a deep abyss, as if treading on thin ice.' From now on, I know my body has been spared harm." This story, recorded in the *Analects*, "Taibo," reminds us that true virtue is lived through constant vigilance and care for one's own conduct.
Once, Zengzi's wife was going to the market to buy things, and their child clamored to go with her. She did not want to take him because the market was crowded and having the child along would be a burden, and he might easily get lost. So she said to the child, "Listen to Mommy and play nicely at home."
But the child cried and fussed, insisting on going. Zeng's wife had no choice but to soothe him, saying, "If you don't go with me, I'll kill the pig and cook it for you when I get back."
The child, upon hearing there would be meat to eat, finally agreed not to go with his mother.
Zeng's wife returned from the market and saw Zeng Shen ready to kill the pig, sleeves rolled up, about to enter the pigpen. She quickly stopped him, saying, "I was just joking about killing the pig to pacify the child. Why are you taking it seriously?"
Zeng Shen replied, "You cannot deceive a child. Their minds are pure, and they learn everything about the world by observing others' words and actions. As parents, if we break our promises, our children will not only be disappointed but also learn to lie themselves. If they continue this way, what will become of them? Since you promised to kill the pig for him, you must follow through. Don't you agree?"
His wife had no words to counter him, so she reluctantly agreed.
Zengzi believed in leading by example and keeping promises when teaching his child. He did not approve of his wife's habit of lying to their son just to make things easier in the moment, knowing that such honesty in parenting was essential for nurturing the child's integrity.
Later, the idiom "Killing the Pig to Teach the Son" was used to warn parents to educate their children with honest words and actions.
Source: *Han Feizi*, Chapter "Outer Congeries of Sayings, Upper Left"
Meaning of the Idiom: Later, the Chinese idiom "杀彘教子" came to describe warn parents to educate their children with honest words and actions.